I Made Too Many Decisions

Unforced Movement
Moving without trying to improve anything.

Before I left, I made a decision.

I was going to wear weights on my wrists.

Not to do anything specific.

Just to add something.

My legs feel stronger now.

My breathing feels easier.

My upper body… not as much.

I didn’t want to turn it into a workout.

Just something extra.

Then I got stuck on something else.

Where to put my phone.

Keys.

Pocket or something else.

I decided on a fanny pack.

I had avoided that before.

It felt too much like I was going out to exercise.

But I didn’t trust my pockets today.

So I used it.

Then the sweatshirt.

Or no sweatshirt.

Back and forth.

I wondered if other people spend this much time deciding small things.

Then I thought maybe they do.

Maybe it’s just part of being tired of bigger decisions.

Eventually I realized it didn’t matter.

I wasn’t going to freeze.

I wasn’t going to overheat.

So I went.

T-shirt. Sweats. Fanny pack. Headphones.

I thought I would just do laps near the house.

Keep it simple.

But I didn’t.

I walked without a plan.

At some point, I felt the weights.

A slight pressure in my shoulders.

I thought about lifting my arms.

Doing something more with them.

So I did.

Then I saw my shadow.

It looked like a T-rex.

Arms up.

Short.

Awkward.

I put them down.

Looked again.

This time, I looked different.

More steady.

More like I was just walking.

I stayed with that.

Let my shoulders carry the weight instead.

I walked a familiar stretch back toward home.

Then before I got too close, I stepped off.

Down the side of the sidewalk.

Turning it into something else.

A small drop.

A short climb back up.

Then I returned to the path.

And walked the rest of the way home.

It was nice.