Oh Well

Unforced Movement
Moving without trying to improve anything.

I went out today without anything in mind.

No music. No version of myself to step into.

Just the walk.

At the start, something familiar showed up.

A past moment turning into a future “what if.”

It started building the way it usually does.

I noticed it.

Then I brought my attention back to the walk.

The weather. My breath. The sound of my steps.

At the crosswalk, there were more cars than usual.

I normally look for a break and cross between them.

Today I pushed the button.

Cars stopped.

For a second, I felt… noticed.

I crossed.

At the entrance to the trail, workers were taping it off.

I asked if it was closed.

They said it was about to be, but I could go ahead.

Again, I felt singled out.

Like I had been allowed through.

I started walking.

There wasn’t much to notice at first.

Just the sound of my steps on the trail.

I did a few push ups on a fence.

A few dips on another.

Then I passed a jogger with a dog off the leash.

The dog came up to me, tail moving, wanting attention.

I let it.

Another small moment of being chosen.

Further down, I reached the part where I’ve been jogging.

I thought, I should run here.

Get in shape faster. Look leaner.

I stopped.

That felt forced.

I didn’t want that.

So I didn’t jog.

I walked faster instead, letting the downhill carry me.

My body felt a little looser.

Less held in place.

I passed a mountain biker.

Another jogger.

Both moving with intention.

I felt something I don’t usually feel.

Oh well.

That stayed for a bit.

On the way back, I reached the crosswalk again.

This time I didn’t check for cars.

I pressed the button.

Waited.

Crossed when it told me to.

That felt like enough.